And now what….

Tonight I attended a meeting regarding Bariatric Surgery.  I am looking to have Lapband or Realize Band (his preferred brand of band) and I”m looking to have it soon.  Some people say it is barbaric.  I say living with some of my issues is plain stupid.

Right now it will be the insurance’s call as I don’t have $12,000 to pay for it myself.  But, basically I have a BMI of almost 37.  I am 100 pounds over weight.  I have sleep apnea.  I have type 2 diabetes (which according to this surgeon is almost always eliminated in cases like mine).  I have thyroid dysfunction.  I have high blood pressure.  I have a hietal hernia. 

The question will be do I have at least a doctor who will vouch for me for the last 7 months as far as my weight loss attempts.  And, a physician who will vouch for me being over weight for at least 3 years.

Those are the normal co-morbidities that generally encourage insurance companies to pay for a LapBand or Realize Band surgery.  I have one more issue.  I have this decomposing nose.  And, with my nose like it is, it is almost impossible to wear my CPAP machine for sleep apnea.  However, with the sleep apnea machine, I don’t get good solid sleep.  Hopefully that last one will put them over the edge if nothing else will.

I have to call the insurance company tomorrow to get the exacts, and to be honest, I don’t look for good news to come right off the bat.  I expect I’ll have to work through my physicians paperwork and tests and my consult with the surgeon before I can actually get insurance to approve it.

Normally, I wouldn’t show you these photos.  And, I can’t stand to look at them.  But, in 2006 when this photo was made…

I told my dear sweet husband that I was going to lose some weight and I would NOT be hiding in the back of our Christmas 2007 photo because I was fat. 

Here’s the Christmas 2007 photo….notice I’m still in the back, hiding my fat….

And, here are a few others to give you a frame of reference before I show you today’s photos….

Me and Boy Genius in 2002 about a week after I found out I was pregnant with Ditto Boy.

I told myself and I promised myself that I would not be known to Boy Genius and Mini Me’s classmates as “the fat woman”…you know as in, “that fat woman is Boy Genius’ Mom or Mini Me’s Mom”.

So, this is what I looked like when we got married.  I was 3 months pregnant and holy cow………….I was swollen up like a balloon and although I am huge, I was losing weight right and left……puke puke and puke some more…..

And, they want life-long proof of my obesity….how’s this for a start on when I first ran the line of being over-weight?

Ok, that jokes not funny is it?  But, my word look how fat I was……YIKES…and I was 8 months old in this photo.  My mom only remembers that because I learned to walk at 8 months.  Mainly because I was too fat to crawl.  So, I would sit and whine til someone stood me up.  I’d walk til I fell, lather rinse and repeat.  But, I’m telling you right now, if one of my kids had learned to walk at 8 months old???? I’d be in a padded cell somewhere….

But, it wasn’t life long….divorce, parties, lots of liquor, and very little food produced these next two photos…

That was on the beach, partying like I had no real good sense in my.

And, this is the photo from my first teaching job……take notice that my face is round but it isn’t just blown up like spongebob roundcheeks….

But, the below photos…they show show the results of age….. and so you get…..what I look like today.

This is today…tonight actually.  I have slowly since late September had my hair cut shorter and shorter……this is it though, no more or else I won’t have a pony tail by summer.  And, please ignore the clutter in the background, after all, it’s almost midnight.

See those rolls around my neck?

That’s a nice shot of the hair in it’s reverse bob.  It’s substantially shorter in the back than in the front.  But, again, see the rolls and the chubby face.

Here you can see the multiple chins as well as the gorgeous arm.

I hate it.  I hate it.  I hate it.  I am not as brave as Y about showing  you photos of my fat rolls around my mid-section but if I get accepted to have this surgery, I will put some in a password protected place for you guys to see and monitor my progress with me…I mean encourage me.  But, for now, we live in such a small town, I don’t want to scar my children when their friends find their me on the internet with fat rolls bulging everywhere……

Ok, got all that!

What’s your opinions on LapBand/Realize Band or Gastric Bypass Surgeries? 

Is there anyone out there who has had the surgery?  Anyone who thought about and backed out. 

I want to hear your stories….please