I woke up in a fairly decent mood. Little did I know that the Mini Me wasn’t going to wake up in such a pleasant mood. When I was writing this post in my head earlier while driving (and tweeting and eating – all at the same time), I was going to make it funny. But, the fact of the matter is, there is nothing funny about it. There is absolutely nothing funny about the manner in which my four year old behaves.
I’ve reached a point with him where I am ready to investigate options of having him tested. I’m going to quote some bits and pieces from another blog so as not to retype the whole thing. Don’t give up on the post there if some of it you already know about the potty training issues, but I want to add some details at the end and then of course, ask for advice.
Just for background, this discussion is about my 4 year old, Mini Me (Jace). The subject is really his attitude, his behavior, is outlook, his stubbornness. I have a couple of ideas and reasons for why I think things are happening like they are, but I want to throw you the bone, I’ll help fetch it later. If you read my tweets today, you know that I was stressing and I mean seriously stressing.
Here are the pieces and parts of the post/email from an earlier date.
As for his potty training. I don’t discuss it anymore. I will only go to the doctor because “I” feel there might be an issue. People have been pushing me for a year to take him. I would hire teachers at the daycare who would say, “I have 4 boys at home, I can potty train him” and about 2 months later, they would say, “have you considered taking him to the doctor”.
And, then there’s more…
“….we’ve tried all the tactics that every single person in the world has recommended. He picked out some cool underwear about 9 months ago, they sit on top of the fridge, they are suppose to taunt him into going to the potty. He can have them when he has gone one week during the day and stayed dry. They are growing dust bunnies. I let him pick out a huge bag of candy. I put a bowl on top of the fridge beside the candy (and the underwear) and told him that every time he used the potty, he could put one piece of candy in the bowl and after supper he could have ALL THE CANDY IN THE BOWL. He has yet to get one piece. We have a sticker chart we use that I started because they wouldn’t sleep in their beds. It worked for that, but he has yet to earn one sticker for pottying….in 3 months…not one sticker.
I bought some plastic pants like you put over cloth diapers. But, that only works if you can get the underwear and plastic pants on him. So, what does he do? He sneaks every morning and gets him a pull-up while I”m getting other stuff ready for school and…….then he will sneak and change it without my knowing. The only time we’ve been successful is when he has poopy pants and then we can force the underwear and plastic pants on him afterwards.  But as soon as we turn our backs, he has sneaked and put on a pull-up.
So, common sense says, “don’t buy pull-ups” but even the 5 year old has to have them at night and if we don’t buy daytime pull-ups, the kid will sneak and put on night time ones to keep from wearing underwear. He has no issues what so ever at bath time with taking his clothes off and running around naked yelling, “see my booty, my naked booty” (oops, that was my fault and my husband hates me for it) but he will not even get near the toilet. My mom bought him a potty chair, he wears it on his head and absolutely refuses to even sit on it with his clothes on. Our doctor suggested that last summer we should let him pee on the grass. Ha, good one, he won’t let anyone near him to pull his pants down.
And, then there’s this….
I’ve also had another philosophy for sometime and it is something that kept me sane when they were newborns, that is, “You can’t control when they eat (what yes, but when, nope), you can’t control when they sleep (or how long or how long it takes them to go to sleep) and you can’t control when they poop.
And, in this case, I honestly can’t control when he pee’s either.
Another suggestion came like this…
My mom suggested that “30 years ago they would have spanked his bottom for wetting or pooping in his clothes” and I said, “yes but is that necessary? I might have to eventually do that but right now, I’m not” to which my mom replied, “well, that’s fine, but if you decide to do that, don’t do it in front of me”
Now, a few extra issues that I want to add in here for some thought…
1. I did potty train between the ages of 2 and 3 (or so says my mom) but even then and for several years after that I would gag and heave and sometimes throw up when I pooped.
2. Up until about 6 months ago we had to FORCE Mini Me to take his own pull-up to the trash. He couldn’t stand the idea of touching it. And, if it was poopy, he would really squawk.
3. Once I was going to make him clean himself up. I got his pull-up off of him while he was standing and then tried to hand him the wipes. He started to gag and cry. He wouldn’t even touch the wipe. He will use the wipes to wash his hands and face but that day, he was not even going to try to wipe with that wipe.
4. Ditto Boy potty trained a few months after he turned 3 and then it was maybe another month or so before he would poop in the potty. But, once he started pooping in the potty, he has NEVER EVER NEVER NEVER NEVER once asked me to wipe his butt.
5. It makes me so sick that I have even called my mom to come to my house to change one of the kids if she was home and I didn’t think I was going to be able to handle it. And, Mini Me knows this. I am certain that he holds his bowl movements until his dad gets home.
6. I puked once when I was pregnant with Mini Me while someone changed a poopy diaper on Ditto Boy in the other end of the house.
7. When someone asks Mini Me a question regarding the potty, he bows his head, hides and refuses to say one word. Not just strangers, but my husband and I cannot get an answer out of him either. NOTHING.
Ok, so there’s the potty issues in a nutshell. If it were you, knowing just that information, what would you do?
To Be Continued…………
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